Can Demons Get High on Caffeine?
by Snoopcatt
Summary: Ciel decides to try out if demons can get high on caffeine. He gives Sebastian a cup of coffee to test it out. Warning: Miley Cyrus references. Takes place in Modern Day times. (21st century) If you like those Sebby loses mind or Sebby get drunk or just one of those ooc stories, this is the story for you. Just trust my word. Try the story out.
1. Miley Cyrus and sebby equals disaster

**I got this idea while I was eating candy nonstop. If you like seeing Sebastian go crazy this is the story for you. Don't forget this takes place in MODERN day**

It all started on a bright sunny morning. Ciel was going through his usual routine: Get awaken by Sebastian, drink tea prepared by Sebastian, eat breakfast made by Sebastian, get dressed (by Sebastian). Then, he had a sudden horrendous thought. Was it posible for demons to get high on caffeine? He decided to try it out. Ciel grabbed a cup of coffee and gave it to Sebastian. "Sebastian, I order you to drink this. THE ENTIRE CUP."

Sebastian knelt. "Yes, my lord."

"Good now hurry up."

Sebby drank the whole thing in one gulp without even blinking an eye. Ciel stared in shock. There was no reaction from Sebastian at all.

"Now then, bocchan. I will resume my morning routine," said Sebastian, as he bowed to Ciel and left the room.

Ciel frowned. As he turned away, he noticed that Sebastian's hand was slightly twitching. Ciel snickered. Perhaps his theory was correct.

5 MINUTES LATER

Mey Rin burst into Ciel's study. "Young master! Young master! There is something wrong with Sebastian, yes there is!"

"What?" asked Ciel, trying to keep the excitement from creeping into his voice.

Mey Rin looked as if she was about to cry. "It seems as if he has lost his mind! Sebastian is dusting off everything with a paintbrush and keeps on going like 'Wob wob wob wob wob wob wob' and dancing around!"

"OH REALLY?!" shouted Ciel, barely able to contain his happiness.

"Oh yes!" sobbed Mey Rin. "He also keeps saying things to himself in a weird voice like 'DON'T DROP THAT DUN DUN DUN.' and stuff like that!"

"ARE YOU SURE?!" Ciel yelled, trying to refrain from jumping up and down.

"Yes! You must come see for yourself!"

Ciel eagerly jumped out his chair and followed after Mey Rin.

They arrived in the kitchen and Mey Rin pointed at Sebastian.

"See, young master?"

Ciel stared at the demon. Sebby was currently dancing a dance that suspiciously looked like the dubstep and the stanky leg mixed in one and singing off tune and... LICKING A SLEDGEHAMMER?!

"I CAME IN LIKE A WREEECKING BALL! I NEVER HIT SO HAAAARD IN LOVE. ALL I WANTED WAS TO BREAAAKKK YOU WALLLLLLLSSS! ALL YOU EVAH DID WAZ RECK RECK RECK MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! YEAH YOUUUU, YOU RECK RECK RECK MEEEEEE!" (lick lick)

Ciel doubled over. "Bwah ha ha! Bwah ha ha!" (don't ask me why ciel laughs like that) "I gotta get this on camera!" Ciel ran off to his room to grab his iPod.

Ciel ran back just in time to see Sebby finish the song. Sebby finished the song with a fluorish. Well, if you count flourish as twerking while licking a sledgehammer.

Ciel ended the recording by falling onto the ground and laughing his ass off.

**AN: Well, that was that. I hope you enjoyed it. Anyway chp 2 should be up sooner or later. I also need ideas. Feel free to review or PM message me. (This chp was rather bad so… sorry)**


	2. Oreos and Robin Thicke

**Sorry I didn't update so fast. I read this thing that said that Oreos were "addictive" than cocaine. (Don't know how to spell it) So.. yeah. Thx for support and stuff!**

"SEBASTIAN!" yelled Ciel. "CAKE!"

Sebastian just frowned. Ciel _always _wanted cake. Was there anytime he didn't want cake? Oh yes, when he wanted pie.

"SEBASTIAN! MUST I REPEAT MYSELF?!"

Sebastian sighed and pulled out the ingredients.

_10 seconds later_

Sebastian walked up the winding staircase up to Ciel's study. Sebastian pulled open the door and walked in holding Ciel's cake.

"Took you long enough," scowled Ciel.

"I apologize my Lord."

Ciel scowled again. Then, his scowl lessened. "Oh yes, Sebastian. I sent Claude and Alois that _little_ _clip_."

"*!*"

"So, my advice to you is be careful of what you watch on the internet."

"Yes, my lord," said Sebastian, bowing. And accidently falling over.

"SEBASTIAN! THAT WAS _MY _CAKE!"

_5 seconds later_

Sebastian found himself holding another piece of cake and walking up to Ciel's study. Because the previous piece had ended up on his face.

"Do NOT fall over in my cake again understood Sebastian."

"Yes my lord," answered Sebastian and walked out the door.

Sebastian found himself in the kitchen facing a pack of Oreos.

"Oh well," he muttered. "I'll just try one."

_3...2...1_

"I WANNA GIVE IT 2 YOU!"

"Oh dear," groaned Ciel. "Again?" Ciel want downstairs with dread in his heart.

"I WANNA GIVE IT 2 YOU! BABY! AND MAKE YOU SO SO SO AMAZING! I'D GIVE IT 2 YOU!"

Ciel looked in horror at the empty boxes on the kitchen table.

**Well, that was chp 2. it sucked. seriously. **_**sigh. **_**PLZ PLZ GIMME IDEAS! GIVE IT TO ME! Okay I hope you weren't that disturbed by the previous sentence. **


	3. Alert

Sorry that this isnt really a chapter, but I want to create another story. (I still am going to continue this one) It's about the characters in modern day. So… yeah. What I want from you readers.

1. Plz review and tell me where this story should be located (Must be in US, sorry, no Alaska or Hawaii)

2. What kind of clothes they should wear (NO PINK DRESSES ALLOWED)

3. What kind of car (NO FREAKING RV TRAILERS FOR SMOKING LAU'S SAKE)

4. And other stuff you would like to see happen in this soon- to- be- out story

I cannot guarantee that I will put 100% of your requests in the future story but I will try. Thank you very much. Don't forget to review or PM message me.

The next chapter for THIS story should be out in a few days (sorry) :(


	4. Tequila

"My Lord, it was blackmail!" Sebastian whined to Ciel.

"You idiot! It was not blackmail!" Ciel yelled at Sebastian.

"Now Claude and Alois will always be making fun of me!"

"Who told you to go off watching Wrecking Ball?"

"But- but- I like that video!" Sebastian said.

"Like that video my ass!" howled Ciel. "It's a nekkid woman swinging on a wrecking ball!"

"That's why I like it!"

"PERVERT!"

_At Danse Macabre_

Ciel stared at his butler fighting Hanna, the triplets, and Claude. He had a feeling that this was going to go very badly.

Hannah pulled out a huge gun/cannon/mortar thing and started to shoot at Sebastian. Ciel looked proudly on as his demon dodged all the bullets, except the few that sliced up his suit.

"Oh dear, I will have to mend this," said Sebastian in a slurred voice.

Ciel facepalmed. Alois leaned over.

"LOL Ciel! Your butler sounds drunk!"

"I know, I know. This is awful," Ciel moaned.

"I wonder how this will turn out!"

"Bad," Ciel muttered into his hand.

"Ha ha! Ciel look at that!"

Sebastian had picked up Claude and was holding him horizontally. And was trying to shove him through his torn up suit.

"ARGGH," Ciel groaned. "It's the tequila."

"Put me down!" Claude yelled. "PUT ME DOWN!"

"Whoa, a talking needle," Sebastian said.

"I AM NOT A NEEDLE!" Claude screamed. "STOP TRYING TO SHOVE YOUR HAND UP MY ASS!"

_Later_

"YOU IDIOT!" screamed Ciel at the top of his lungs.

"What?" groaned Sebastian. He had an awful headache.

"You tried to have sex with Claude!"

"Wha-? I did?"

"You tried to pull his pants down!"

"Oh."

"You know what? NO MORE TEQUILA!"

"Catnip tequila?" Sebastian said hopefully.

"DEFINITELY NOT!"

**Review or else! I also finished the first chapter of the modern story. I'm having Ciel, Sebastian, Claude, and Alois run away to China on plane. That should turn out funny. So, go check it out. Thx.**


	5. Tequila Part 2

_There were many problems, _Ciel noted, _with Sebastian's addiction to tequila. _For starters, he would raid the wine cellar weekly for leftover tequila. This usually sparked a conversation that went like this:

"Sebastian, what are doing?" snapped Ciel, annoyed.

"Gettin at the tequila, duh," Sebastian would say.

"As your master, you may not speak so rudely to me," scowled Ciel.

"Aw, piss off," giggled Sebastian, pawing through the alchohol.

"You know what, you stupid demon?"

"Wut?" asked Sebastian.

"I hope you die from alchohol poisoning," growled Ciel.

These weekly conversatios would take place every week. The worst part was that Sebastian would get drunk and do un-Sebastian things.

For one thing, he would run shirtlesss down the hallways. Another thing was that we would go off shouting _Fuckin Problems_. This usually resulted in two main things, Ciel tried to cut off Sebastan's penis and Mey-Rin used up all th hankerchiefs and napkins in the manor.

_NOW_

"I luv bad bitches, that's my fuckin problem! And yeah I like to duck that's my fuckin problem!" screamed Sebastian, zooming through the hallways at top speed.

Ciel woke up from his nap and grabbed a pair of scissors and stomed after Sebastian.

"COME BACK HERE, DEMON!" shouted Ciel. "LET ME CUT YOUR PENIS OFF!" roared Ciel running behind Sebastian.

"Nope! Can't catch me!" laughed Sebastian, unbuttoning his pants as he ran.

"NOO! Don't pull your pants off!" Ciel shouted, desparately throwing the scissors at Sebastian's dick.

"OOOHH- WAHHH!" squealed Mey Rin. "He is so beautiful, yes he is!" Blood gushed form Mey rin's nose. She reached into her pocket and pulled out a box of tissues. _*wipe wipe* "_So beutiful!" _*wipe wipe* _

"NOO! Mey Rin! Those were our last tissues!" shrieked Ciel.

**YAY! ANOTHER CHAPTER DONE!**


End file.
